{"id":84,"date":"2007-08-18T08:13:27","date_gmt":"2007-08-18T12:13:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.crankopotamus.com\/blog\/?p=84"},"modified":"2007-08-18T08:13:27","modified_gmt":"2007-08-18T12:13:27","slug":"two-part-invention","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/two-part-invention\/","title":{"rendered":"Two-part invention"},"content":{"rendered":"

It was almost midnight on Christmas Eve, 2002. Sarah and I were at her parents’ house. The party was over, and I had eaten far too many cookies, as usual. I was lying on the floor like a beached whale, watching the end of Holiday Inn, <\/em>also as usual.<\/p>\n

When the movie ended, we made up the pull-out couch in the office and crawled in. I snuggled close and wrapped my arm around her. I whispered in her ear, “Merry Christmas, honey.”<\/p>\n

Then my eyes snapped open. “Oh, my God. You’re pregnant!”<\/p>\n

“Now, honey,” she said. “Even if I am, it’s too early to tell. And it might take us a while. I don’t want you to get your hopes up.” But I just knew.<\/p>\n

A few days later, we went to CVS to buy a pregnancy test. I picked up a single pack. Sarah said, “They’re cheaper if you buy three.”<\/p>\n

I smiled. “We don’t need three. We don’t even need one. I already know you’re pregnant.” She laughed, and we bought the single pack.<\/p>\n

Seven months later, and she was as big as a house. We were going sailing with Sarah’s parents. We were in the dinghy, on our way out to the boat, when I was struck by the same cosmic lightning that had hit me on Christmas Eve. “We’re having a girl,” I said.<\/p>\n

Sarah turned and looked at me. She peered into my eyes.<\/p>\n

“Baloney,” she said.<\/p>\n

Happy birthday, Nathaniel.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It was almost midnight on Christmas Eve, 2002. Sarah and I were at her parents’ house. The party was over, and I had eaten far too many cookies, as usual. I was lying on the floor like a beached whale, watching the end of Holiday Inn, also as usual. When the movie ended, we made … Continue reading Two-part invention<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[2,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-84","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nate","category-sarah"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=84"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=84"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=84"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crankopotamus.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=84"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}